Sometimes, Farming Isn’t Fun

Sometimes, Farming Isn’t Fun

Sometimes, Farming Isn’t Fun

If you have livestock, you’ll also have dead stock.–Anonymous One of the reasons I started this blog was to share our weird crazy wonderful life.  However, I think it’s only fair if I share the heartbreaking along with the hilarious.  I think we get so caught up in the perfect families on Facebook, Instagram, and blogs that we feel their lives have something ours is missing.  So, in an effort at providing you with a more realistic view of our life, today were going to touch on a bit of the heartbreaking. I’ve told you before about our small flock

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Fridays at the Funny Farm: The Definition of Futility

Fridays at the Funny Farm: The Definition of Futility

Bear with me, I’m going to be nerdy for just a second.  I promise it’s relevant later. Ralph Waldo Emerson has been quoted as saying metaphysics is “a blind man, in a dark room, chasing a black cat which isn’t there.”  For today’s post, allow me to go with the spirit of the quote, rather than the letter.  I say that’s the definition of futility.  After all, I think the futility of metaphysics was Emerson’s point. …I became the definition of futility! We have rabbits.  More specifically, we have a breeding trio of rabbits.  I like rabbits.  They are quiet,

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Fridays at the Funny Farm: The King of the Jackasses

Fridays at the Funny Farm: The King of the Jackasses

…we bought a jackass in disguise! Each time I feed Finnbar, I sing a parody of Elvis Presley’s “Devil in Disguise”.  It goes something like this:

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Fridays on the Funny Farm: There are Stupid Questions!

Fridays on the Funny Farm: There are Stupid Questions!

…someone asked a stupid question. I know some amazing teachers.  People who want to mold, guide and prepare future generations.  I have tremendous respect for those folks, and there are several to whom I owe a great debt.  However, we aren’t going to talk about them today. Today, we’re going to talk about Mrs. Wilcox.  Mrs. Wilcox taught me important lessons.  In the third grade, she taught that, not all teachers love their job, not all women love children, and that in 1979 not everyone had conquered their double-knit polyester addictions. Mrs. Wilcox looked like Dorothy Hamill’s over-worked discontent great-aunt

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Fridays on the Funny Farm: Farm Moms Say the Darnedest Things

Fridays on the Funny Farm: Farm Moms Say the Darnedest Things

 …I didn’t sound like a lunatic!  No, really. (Those of you who have known me since before kids: STOP LAUGHING!) Anyone who is a parent knows the job comes with some surprises. Once you’re a parent, you WILL find yourself saying things that no normal person ever expects to utter.  Let’s begin with the sane, but annoying.  I’ve cringed to hear things cross my lips that set my teeth on edge as a child. My mother’s voice intoning “Be aware of your surroundings” echoes irritatingly through my childhood memories.  Yet, I can’t count the times I’ve said the same words

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Fridays at the Funny Farm: The Bucket Incident

Fridays at the Funny Farm: The Bucket Incident

…The Sheep Kicked the Bucket! We raise a small flock of St. Croix sheep. They’re hair sheep, which means they don’t grow wool and aren’t used for fiber. Some farmers use them for milk, but mostly they’re bred to fill the freezer. There are a lot of advantages to St. Croix as a breed. They’re docile, heat tolerant, and very parasite resistant. This resistance is great, because parasites are a huge concern with sheep. However, they…are…sheep. Which means they have the herd mentality, poor critical thinking, and short-bus IQ’s that come with intrinsic sheepiness. Today’s story begins with a question.

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Keepin’ It Real, Yo (Wow! That sounds dorky even to me.)

Keepin’ It Real, Yo (Wow!  That sounds dorky even to me.)

Someone forgot to tell Life there was a plan!   You know those days that just don’t work out?  Yep, I’ve had a couple of those this week.  Nothing terrible or tragic, just a steady stream of irritating and inconvenient.  There were some positives too!  I’m not really planning to moan or whine; I’m just pointing out that I have days where the plan does NOT cover the contingencies! 

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Fridays at the Funny Farm: Attack of the Killer Zombie Duck

Fridays at the Funny Farm: Attack of the Killer Zombie Duck

…We were attacked by a zombie! Note:  Today’s post deals with butchering an animal.  There are no gory pictures, but there are slightly gory descriptions and several dark senses of humor.  Remember, I’m an ICU nurse.  ICU nurses don’t survive without a heavy dose of compassion tempered with a dash of warped humor!  And…my kids,…well let’s just say, ‘they’re ‘kin to their Mama’.

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Fridays at the Funny Farm: We Met the Neighborhood Bully!

Fridays at the Funny Farm: We Met the Neighborhood Bully!

…a funny thing happened on the way to get coffee. I’m a night nurse for one very good reason.  I don’t do mornings.  If I’m awake and functioning in the dark hours of the morning, I promise I’m still up from the night before.  So, imagine the nonverbal somnambulistic condition I’m in when I carpool to work with Liam.  He leaves the house at 04:00.  That is 04:00……in the morning!  The “it’s dark, so why am I awake at this ungodly hour” morning.

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Outfitting Your Kitchen: Crazy Day Survival 101

Outfitting Your Kitchen: Crazy Day Survival 101

Ummm…I forgot to put on pants. It was one of those rare ‘stay in your pajamas’ days.  The kids were going to do morning chores, leaving me free to hibernate until afternoon.  I was comfortably ensconced on the couch with a cup of tea, a good book, and fresh muffins.  Then, my phone rang.  It was one simple sentence.  Grace (breathlessly): The sheep are out. Not only were they out, they were ALL out.  They were in the big pasture where our horses graze, including the horse that hates sheep.

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